To The Provider, The Sustainer. To He Who is able to do Everything.

To The Provider, The Sustainer. To He Who is able to do Everything.

In the midst of trouble
I am calling out to You
I know you have promised to take care of Your children
I know this is true because You cannot lie
You are He who is able to do everything
All things
Anything
The most powerful God who Sees me
You know my ups and downs
You know how I feel in a moment
You know how I will feel in the next
Please look down on us and provide a way for us to maintain
My God, You are the sustainer of our home and our lives
You have already seen the end from the beginning
And I recognize that it is my responsibility to have faith in Your plan
Help me when my faith waivers I ask
Help me to trust in You
I give all praise to You
Praise be to God - The Most Merciful, The Provider and Sustainer
Praise be to God who is able to do all things.

About a Dog and a Prayer

This morning I woke up to my smallest dog, Tootie, gagging. She continued to dry heave on and off for a couple hours. Most of the time I'm like 'ehh thug it out homegirl' but something about the way she kept doing it started worrying me.  So we went to the vet.  -___-

She got a quick exam by the doctor and he recommended we do 3 X-rays to make sure she hadn't eaten something that was blocking her up.  I asked him the price (because X-rays = $$).  He came back with an estimate of $300+! I immediately felt my chest tighten and the anxiety rising.  I talked to Lamar about what we should do and went back and forth with the doctor about different options because $300 wasn't going to happen.  We decided to do 1 X-ray and hope that any issue would show and not be hiding in some other view.  The doctor said that if nothing showed in the one X-ray, it was "highly likely that there is nothing there."  So that was the plan... A little over $100 less.  Still a lot, but a much easier pill to swallow. 

When the nurse went to set everything up, I sat in the exam room thinking. I started praying that nothing serious was wrong with Tootie.  I felt worried and anxious about the money. I started thinking about trying to get more hours at the studio. 

Then I had a very important thought.

My God is the owner and controller of everything.  He cares about the tiny sparrow and thus cares about my little dog. He has a plan for my life. Most of the time when I think of God having a plan, I only think about it workwise.  But His plan is for my LIFE. Everything and every part of it.  He has a plan for this particular event.  If something unforeseen should come up in the X-ray, God will guide Lamar and me to the proper course of action.  He will provide the means to handle whatever situation He allows into our lives.  

As I prayed, I began pulling scriptures in.  It was like, "Father, this is what You promised me. This is what You said." I asked for forgiveness for my lack of faith at the beginning.  There is no need for me to be anxious or worried... 'Don't be anxious for anything, but in everything with prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, bring your requests to God'... God is in control. When I said amen, I felt such a peace.  The tension had left my chest.  The anxiety was gone.  Before praying I felt like I was heading quickly towards a panic attack. This showed me the great difference between trying to handle things on my own versus giving them to God. 

They didn't find anything in the X-ray, so the doctor advised we have Tootie fast for the rest of today and the give her bland food tomorrow.  

Before I could ask anything about what kind of food, the nurse said she was going to find me some free samples.  She came back with two containers of canned food and a bag of dry food.  She gave me enough food for at least 3 days.  Then when I got to the desk to pay, the final charge was $60 less than we discussed! All I could think was... my God is good! 

At this time, Tootie's sleeping next to me. She hasn't tried to throw up since getting home. :) Prayerfully she's done with her antics! 

On another note, normally I have a 'default' way of praying.  Pretty straightforward and basic.  But recently I've been listening to prayers on this app called Abide. My friend Brianna, introduced me to it.  Each morning it gives you a prayer based in scripture.  You can also find prayers for particular topics.  It's a really good app if you are looking to improve your prayer life.  Anyway, through listening to those prayers, I've found myself remembering scriptures more often in my prayers.  I think that's awesome.

That's it. I hope this story goes to remind you that God's got you.  It's up to us to believe it.  I'm really trying to get better at that.

Story Time: 1 Kings 19:11-13

The other day I was re-listening to chapter 19 of 1st Kings and I heard this passage that I somehow missed the first time I listened.  Here is the passage:

And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord.  And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: and after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.  And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave.  And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here Elijah?
[1 Kings 19:11-13]

This passage has stuck with me throughout the last few weeks.  If has me thinking about how often we expect God to come like a hurricane wind or earthquake or the fire... but He is often that whisper.   It's almost as if the scripture is warning us not to miss who God is while focusing on what we think He should be.

I love the idea of God as a whisper.  And I love that He is also that great storm.  Thinking of God as having both of these qualities really gives a clearer picture.  He is the kind, comforting, inviting God who sees me.  He is the hurricane, the earthquake, the pillar of fire - the Mighty God.  He is the beginning and end of everything there is and the sustainer of life.  He is the protector and provider.  The builder and the breaker.  He is all these things, but still bends low to hear me.  He numbers the hairs on my head and knows my deepest hopes.  This is my God.

Holy Thou Art God

We sang part of this song during choir rehearsal tonight. It is such a moving song and I just wanted to share it with you. :) 

 

Holy Thou Art God - Richard Smallwood & Vision

 

Story Time! I had a Dream

A couple days ago I had a rather interesting dream.  In this dream, there were hundreds and hundreds of bat looking demons.  They were locking themselves together in the sky to block out the sun.  From where I stood, I could see more and more of these things coming from underground.

Soon they had blocked the sun to the point that it was just a dark spot that didn't even hurt to look at and everything was bathed in this dark red color.  All the people were afraid and everyone was crying and yelling "They've blocked out the sun! What do we do!?"

In the midst of the chaos, a person came forward and started singing worship songs to God.  As the person sang, some others joined in and the demons started to fall from the sky.  More people joined in and more demons fell.  As long as the people kept worshiping God the demons failed, but when they stopped worshiping, the demons would start trying to block the sun again.

That was the whole dream. 

Now I have a theory about dreams... most dreams I forget upon waking and try as I might, I cannot recall them.  Sometimes, as in the case of this dream, I remember them after waking and all throughout the day.  These are the dreams that I believe are meant to be shared and always have some sort of lesson in them.

When I woke up, I immediately related the dream to my emotional life.  To me, the demons represented depression/anxiety and the sky was me.  There are days when I feel like the sadness is flooding me and threatening to block out all the light.  It seems like there is no way out from under it, but it is in those darkest times when my spirit is crying out, "The light is gone! What do I do!?" that I should stop and worship God.

He is the all powerful One who is full of mercy.  He will clear away the darkness and bring me back to the light as long as I keep my eyes and heart on Him.

I just wanted to share this with you :) Have a wonderful day!

Story Time! God's Protection

A couple months ago my brother-in-law and I were running an errand in my car when it began to rain.  Now my tires weren't in good condition by any stretch of the imagination and he rarely ever drives it.  So as you can guess, we hydroplaned.  Don't worry, we barely lost control at all.  Anywho, when we got to our destination, we looked at the tires to see if there was any damage.  They were nearly completely bald. 0.0  I made a mental note to get them replaced.  And we went about our business.

In the days following, I started noticing that my steering wheel was shaking quite a bit, it felt like the car was limping, and the breaks started making all manner of noise. (Sidenote: normally you know when your breaks are going because they start to whine, then squeak, then squeal, then scream... mine just jumped straight to screaming.)  I asked Lamar to take a look at it.  He took a Sunday evening to change the breaks and figured he'd ask one of his mechanic friends what the shaking could be.

When he took the driver side tire off to change the breaks, we got to see how good God is first hand.  This was the nearly totally bald tire and on the inside edge the rubber had ground down to the wires.  Those exposed wires were shredded and the tire insides were bulging out.  It was that bulge that was making the car limp/shake.

I could only praise God for keeping me as I was driving to and from work and in the rain and in traffic... because that tire looked like it was going to blowout at any moment.  Needless to say, I got a replacement tire the next day!

This whole experience reminded me of this text:

For He shall give His angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.  They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.
Psalm 91:11-12

Praise be to God for His continuing protection.  This is what my parents mean when they pray for Him to keep us from dangers "seen and unseen."

It is Good

"God saw all that He had made, and it was very good."
Genesis 1:31 NIV

Some nights I get caught up in one creative endeavor or another, and end up not going to bed until after 3 am...  I find my mind gets full of ideas and I just have to get them out.

The most recent "midnight crafting" session started with me working on the daily Listers Gotta List prompt.  When I finished all the decorating and whatnot, I sat looking at the notebook I was using.  I thought "I can totally make this..."  So I set out to make a pocket size saddle stitched notebook and spent the next hour or so planning and executing a design. 

Sometimes I'm amazed by the ideas I'll get and the things I've created.  I honestly believe that creativity is a gift from God because it is truly awesome.  And not awesome like totally cool but awesome like full of awe.

I think that the feeling I get when I see the finished project is some small form of what God felt when He looked at the world and said "it is good." I'm so grateful to God for giving me this gift of creativity.  I love losing myself in the act of making and letting my ideas and hands flow together.  There are very few things that I do these days that allow me to reach that 'everything falls away' level of flow.  So discovering that midnight crafting is the doorway is a welcomed experience.

I love that when I'm submerged in making, I regularly drift into thoughts of how great God is... Has creating become a quiet act of worship?  I think it's on its way there :)

So Shall We Ever Be

Whenever I see a sunset like this, or the sun breaks through the clouds just so, I can't help but think of Jesus returning.

For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first:  Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.  1 Thessalonians 4:16-17

Hello 29 ^.^

Hi there!

My 29th birthday was last Tuesday.  Lamar planned out a full day of activities and it was awesome.  I'll write about the day later :)  Now, aside from the excited "it's my birthday" feelings, the day also brought some sobering thoughts.  Well... I shouldn't say 'sobering' because that sounds too sad.  It brought thoughts of thankfulness and awe.

The day after my birthday, I was driving to work and began reflecting on the many things that God carried me through during my 20's.  I thought about my first experience with depression in college.  I remembered how the simple act of staying awake became a massive task and things like crossing a street became life and death actions.  I remembered many nights spent crying or just laying on the floor... feeling like I was physically in a hole and unable to get out.  It was around this time that a friend told me to lift my hand up to heaven and ask God for comfort.  At first it sounded silly, but one day, in tears, I sat outside with my hand in the air until I felt the lightest brush against it.  And that was the comfort I needed.  Another time, I remembered laying on my dorm room floor in the fetal position coming to the conclusion that it was okay if I didn't wake up the next day.  In that moment, I felt like I was being hugged and it brought me so much peace.  I can recall numerous instances when I know that God was comforting me, speaking to me, or giving me a measure of peace. Now of course, as I replayed memory after memory, I started praising God for His care throughout those times.

It's so amazing that the God of the universe cares about me.  I mean think about that.  The God of the universe and all that is, ever was, and ever will be cares about you :)  He knows your name.  He knows my name.  As I turned these thoughts over in my head, this song came to mind.

Who am I, that the God of all the Earth

Would care to know my name

Would care to feel my hurt?

Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star

Would choose to light the way

For my ever wandering heart?

I am a flower quickly fading

Here today and gone tomorrow

A wave tossed in the ocean

A vapor in the wind

Still you hear me when I'm calling

Lord you catch me when I'm falling

And you've told me who I am

I am yours...

That... right there... is the blessing of reaching another birthday.  It gives another opportunity to thank God for loving me & protecting me & comforting me & carrying me & saving me & keeping me & allowing me to be able to share my testimony that God, my God, is Powerful.  He is a mighty, yet loving, warrior who fights my battles.  He defends me when my struggles try to flatten me.  He gives me hope. 

Happy 29th birthday to me :)

What's the Lesson?

So it kinda sucks for this to be the first post of 2015, but it is what it is.

Last week I had an interview for a company that does benefits administration.  I did all the recommended reading about the company and asked my brother-in-law to give me his perspective of working there.  I went over the practice questions the recruiter provided.  I refreshed myself on my past call center experiences.  I prayed.  I got there early.  I was personable and engaging.  I answered all the questions thoroughly.  I gave firm handshakes and good eye contact.  I asked follow up questions relevant to the business and policies.  I felt good afterward.

Buuuut... I got an email this morning saying, "after careful evaluation of your qualifications, we have decided that our current opportunities will now effectively utilize your skills and background."  It really sucked to see that as I started my day.

I'm really glad that when I woke up this morning, I had a little conversation with God about helping me stay on top of my anxiety (which has been threatening to flare up recently).  Then I did an hour of yoga.  During that time I meditated and focused on aligning my chakras and calming my mind.  After practicing, I had breakfast and a nice cup of green tea.

Then my peaceful state was shaken by that email.  After reading it and resisting the urge to cry/crawl back under the covers I started thinking "what's the lesson"??  I mean, there has to be a lesson or some point to any struggles that God allows you to go through.  So I'm sitting here, watching Tia & Tamera trying to figure out what the lesson could possibly be.

So far... I have..

• Maybe He's trying to get me to focus on working for Him more than to better my current financial situation.  Maybe I need to look for employment that will allow me to be more Christ centered. 
• Maybe He's trying to tell me that He is going to provide for my needs.  I've been looking for a new job so that I can make more money so that Lamar and I can move to our first place.  I've been taking a lot of responsibility to do that on myself.  Maybe God is saying 'remember Philippians 4:19'...

And my God will liberally supply (fill to the full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

• Maybe He's just saying find a way to enjoy this time of ease.  Use it to do other things.  You're picking up more interest in your handmade goods.  Use this time as a gift.

That's all I've got.  I am feeling better after thinking of these lessons.  Please keep me in prayer while I continue pondering what lessons I can learn from these setbacks.

Oh! Happy new year :) *chuckle*

Oceans: A How I'm Feeling Post

It was really hard to get out of bed today.  And what makes it worse, I've felt myself sliding into this one.  But there's nothing I can do except pray it's a short one.

I did get myself up a couple times, but ended up back in bed... curled up.  The last time dragged my body out of bed, put clothes on and went into the living room.  I opened the front door since I kinda remembered someone knocking on it so I thought maybe the remaining wedding invitations had come.  It wasn't them.  Instead, there was a package from the library.

A couple weeks ago, I was getting dressed for church and listening to Pandora.  A song called Oceans by Hillsong came on and I immediately liked it.  Especially, the vamp at the end:

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever you would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith would be made stronger
In the presence of my savior

So I found it at the library and requested home delivery.  Based on my account, I wasn't expecting it until tomorrow.  So today, when I saw it, I put it on straight away.  Thinking this will help me feel better.  But the vamp was not the reason I got the CD today.  This was...

I will call upon Your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

An ocean is what I have always described my depression as.  A deep dark ocean.  With threatening waves.  Unknown depths.

Sometimes I'm on the shore, just inside the water... maybe up to my knees.  I can still see the shore. My feet are still on the ground.  I'm deep enough for the strength of the waves to move me, but not knock me down.  If something shakes me, I can still get out.

But there are other times that I feel like Peter, out in the middle of dark water and the waves are huge and there is no way I can possibly swim.  And I start to sink. 

When I first started sinking, my friend Ricardo told me to go outside and hold my hand up for God to grab me.  It was weird, but worked. A lot.  I still do it... 8 years later.

I will call upon Your name // Keep my eyes above the waves // When oceans rise

When I feel myself in the middle of the vastness of my oceans I feel so small.  Infinitely small. Like dust.  Like one good strong wave could dissolve me.  Treading water is hard.  My limbs are tired.  My lungs burn.  And all I can do is whisper...

JesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesusJesus

God showed me today that He cares about little me.

Thankfulness: This Day is Done

Today I wanted to do a few specific things that I knew I shouldn't do like sedate myself with benadryl, burn my wrist, close my eyes while driving.  It's just kinda been one of those days, you know?  One of the kind where you want to get back in bed, close your eyes, roll around a couple times, and then get out... on the right side of bed.  But you can't because real life doesn't work that way.  And the reality of this day is, I was down.  Down days come and down days go, but you just gotta muscle thru them.

I think the worst part of today and my recent downswing has been that I've put so much guilt on myself.  Saying things like,

"Oh Caleisha, you don't have a right to feel down or sad because nothing has happened to you.  You have close friends who have lost family members in the last week. What have you lost? Nothing. You haven't even lost a ball of yarn. You have a job. You enjoy your job. You have a loving fiance. You have a loving family. You have your health.
You don't have the right to feel down and depressed."  

This is my self talk in my head.  And that's not good. That's just like someone telling you, "Oh you're having a down day? You're feeling depressed? Just stop feeling depressed.  There are worse things in the world."

That doesn't really help. That's not constructive. I know there are worse things in the world, but right now in my head, I can't help but feel this way.  If there was some switch I could flip and feel better, I totally would.  Being down SUCKS... I don't want to wallow in it. I'm not choosing to feel this way.  It's just out of my control and that's how my life is sometimes.

I think that what makes depression hard is that everyone doesn't understand it.  I mean, you can say to somebody I'm crying because I stubbed my toe and they understand that pain.  Or I'm sad because I miss my family.  People get that.  But with depression or depressed feelings there's not necessarily a reason.

I just am... and people don't understand 'I just am.' 

People want to know what happened or why you're sad.  It's like they want to be able to concretly place you on a graph of emotions and reactions so they can understand the headspace you're in.  But 'I just am' doesn't plot well on this coordinate plane of existence... it really doesnt...

So I end up just lying for the most part... "I'm fine." But I know, and the person I'm talking to knows that I'm not, but I'm going to continue doing my job even if I feel like drugging myself or hiding in the bathroom and crying.  Being a grown up doesn't really leave room for many breakdowns. 

It's just been a rough day.  But at the end of this day, I'm thankful that I have a boss that sympathizes with my ups and downs.  I'm thankful that I got thru the day with no panic attacks or serious anxiety issues.  I'm thankful that my last 2 appointments of the day didn't show up.  I'm thankful the day is over.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better. If not and it's another day like today, I'll do my best to get through it.

Goodnight.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While I was typing this, Lamar was sleeping on the sofa next to me.  He left the tv on the Arsenio show and the preachers from the Preachers of LA reality show were on.  They had a preach off and were to do 30 second sermons titled 'Life is Not a Reality Show.'  I stopped to listen and Deitrick Haddon spoke about life being reality but not a show.  Whatever things we are going through, God is powerful enough to carry us through.  He quoted Ephesians 3:20-21 and I cried.

Now unto Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, unto Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen

I'm asking God to give me peace through this downswing.  He is able to exceedingly abundantly above that.  Thank you God for carrying me through.

Thankfulness: Parable of the Pearl

I want to tell you a little story ^.^

In the Bible (Luke 15:8-10), Jesus tells a parable about a woman who has 10 coins and loses one.  She lights a candle and sweeps up the whole house to find it.  When she finally finds it, she calls all her friends to celebrate with her.  The story was to help us understand how God feels when one of us repents.

So this past Wednesday was a busy busy day at the studio.  I mean we were completely booked solid.  Needless to say I was exhausted by the time I got home.  I changed my clothes and started to reach for my computer for some therapeutic YouTube time only to come to a terrible realization.

MY PEARL WAS GONE!

Honestly, I think my heart stopped... or at least I stopped breathing and immediately started searching my room, bathroom, living room, walk way outside, parking lot, & car for the lost pearl.  But unlike the woman with the coin, all my searching still came up empty.  This, of course, led to me curled up in the bed sobbing to Lamar about the lost pearl.  Lamar, in his clear-headed way, told me to stop crying and check at work.

The next morning, I got up and went to the studio to continue the search.  When I got there, I looked all over the register area. No pearl.  The guest waiting area.  No pearl.  The sales areas.  No pearl.  :(  The last place it could be was the camera room and at the time I was looking there had been 3 sessions in and out of it, plus the custodians had vacuumed the night before.  (Hope dwindling)  I started looking around the camera room and blessings abound, THERE WAS MY PEARL! Right in the middle of the camera room. My pearl was sitting on the carpet waiting for me to pick it back up. 

After I came down from the emotional high of finding my lost pearl, all I kept thinking of were the parables Jesus told.  I kept picturing myself as the pearl and Jesus searching the bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, walk way outside, parking lot, car, register area, waiting area, sales area, and camera room.  I pictured Him putting aside everything He was planning on doing, to look for me.

Thank You for that Christ object lesson, God.  Thank You for caring so much about me.  Thank You for making me Your pearl.

Not So Blue Monday #20: God Moves

[It's a long one... but a good one]

Today presented itself as a series of unfortunate events that became illustrations of God's grace.

I woke up this morning with the plan of attending a job fair held by one of the area churches.  Since I've never been to a job fair and had no idea how many employers were going to be there I figured I needed to print more resumes. (This is the beginning of the unfortunate events.)  After getting dressed I pulled up my resume on Lamar's computer to print. But when the printing was done I saw that I hadn't pulled out the paper tray so all my prints were crunched up inside the printer.  :-/  So I took a breath and printed again.

Front pages successful... back page... not so much... Turned out I put the first set in the printer wrong so the text from the back printed on the front... *sigh* (double sided printing woes)...

Then the ink ran out.  Go figure.

Again, I started breathing deeply and praying "Ok, God. Please help me not panic."  I figured going to the library to make copies was the best option.  So I got all my stuff together for the job fair and went. When I got to the library, I went to put the car in park and nothing happened.  (The car's shifter cable is kinda broken and Lamar and I have been just pushing it back into place when need be.) So I got out and made the adjustment.

Library printing was a success. Huzzah!

Now I'm getting back in the car prepared to go smile my face off at this job fair.  My hair's still in place. I didn't get any smutz on my blouse from fiddling with the shifter cable.  My skirts still pressed.  Things are looking good.  Until...

The car won't shift out of park.

My immediate thought was "CRAP!!!! It's really broken now! What am I going to do!?" **deep breath deep breath deep breath** I'm in the car trying to breathe my tears away and praying desperately for help.  Then I looked up.

The library is right next to Advance Discount Auto Parts.  ^.^

So I go over and tell the guy what's going on and ask if he has something I can use to fix it.  He asks some car details and takes me on a walk around the store... I'm still praying silently for something I can use. I look down while he's telling me that they don't carry anything for Mazdas and my eyes fall on a packet of wire grommets...  Essentially, they are thick rubber rings.  I asked him if I could put this on the engine part and he said sure.

One fit perfectly!  

Off to the job fair :)  Resumes in hand, shifter cable fixed, clothes still clean, hair in place. I'm thanking God the whole way and thinking:

My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

The job fair was alright.  I'm suppose to get a call from the YMCA for a job in their summer program, so that's great.  But to me, the best part of the whole thing was meeting the recruiter for Sprint.  She was very encouraging while we spoke.  Her whole 'message' was be excellent at your level. Something I need to here these days.

So that was my day...

If that printer hadn't have run out of ink I wouldn't have had this testimony to share.  I think this is long enough.  I hope you got through the whole thing :)

Orchestration

Sometimes you meet people that unknowingly bless you in their existence. Just their everyday goings on.  I think that when I realize this, it's God showing me that He's orchestrating things all the time.  Creating networks and connections so that I get a comment, that leads me to a blog, that gives me just the right encouraging word that I needed today.  Everything's in His control.  All the time. In good. In bad.  When my emotions are running amok and all I can feel is sadness pouring into me.  When the cave of me floods, God will give me air bubbles to breathe along the ceiling...  I know life is screwed up.  I know that everything isn't always going to be happy, but God's got me.  He always has. He always will.

I prayed today that God would help me put all  this in His hands... I'm still trying to understand how that's done.  But I know He'll show me.  He's good like that.

Big Thursday (Ugh... can this title be any lamer?)

When I woke up for work (a teensy bit later than planned) this morning, I didn't think that my day would include so many awesome-tastic things :)

The work shift was what could be expected with a job title of 'Data Entry' so I won't even speak on that. The meat and goodness of the day came in the bits between.  I was able to steal away a few moments of blog reading after lunch and made this awesome discovery:  Shakti made a quote-pic from one of my favorite poems! I love it when others find appreciation and value in something that means so much to me. [Check out her post -here-]

After leaving work, I went by the library to drop off a cd & dvd that Lamar left and first of all, the traffic was insane... ugh... I hate the stop & go life! Anyway, at the library I met a girl who makes natural hair products (Angela Janelle of Natural Beauty Mart).  We got talking about natural hair then sewing then crafting then crafternoons. I was/am rather proud of myself for not chickening out after the brief natural hair commentary. I actually started the convo about sewing after noticing her looking at that section.  Normally I would just quietly sneak away back to my yarny lair.  But I'm making an effort to be more outgoing and social since Lamar isn't here.  I have hermit tendencies... and I need to address this.

Before leaving the library, I stopped in the "Friends of the Library" used bookshop and got these two.

Streams in the Desert ($1) is a devotional that I first heard of from my friend Sharea.  I remember it being timely... and one can never have too many devotional books.  Of course I had to buy this Needlecraft book. Of course! I love the old books. This one is from... 1975 and I paid 75 cents for it. ^.^ Yay for vintage books for the steal!

FLAG ON THE PLAY!!! I just opened the cover of Streams in the Desert and this is what is written there:

10-11-2002

To our Darling Daughter:

I pray that this little devotional book will bless you as mine  has since 1979.

Every time I have been hurt, worried, sick, or just sad, I pick up my book- and it's as if God has a special word for me.

Honey, life isn't easy - but with the Lord's help- we will make it all the way to our eternal home.

Stay close to the Lord. Learn to forgive others & yourself. Be thankful and look for joy everywhere.

Happy 35th birthday - We love you so very much - never forget that.

Always in our hearts & my prayers.

Love,

Mama & Daddy

There was more to my day, but I'm going to end this post on that note. Good night and I hope your Thursday was a wonderful one.

Life isn't easy, but there will be streams in the desert...